“Robots make me sick to my ass” – Mom from Futurama

I have a love/hate relationship with technology,

Off of the top of my head, here are some examples of technology that I love:

     1.   The Switcher   _ This is actually the television remote. My  

            father-in law calls it the “Switcher”. Now when my wife

            asks for the remote, I correct her & call it ‘the Switcher’.

           (That’s right before she says “Get your OWN drink Pomeroy”)

            But I get annoyed when I can’t find it. I get my exercise going        

            up and down stairs, thank you very much.

2.    The apple corer – Am I the ONLY one who just discovered this little gem recently? Shit… Now I don’t have to worry about Mars Inc. making apple flavored Skittles.

3.   The DVR/Tivo – Yes… I will now have to endure more product placement within a program. But it’s WORTH it. Now if I could only  get myself to stop trying to rewind my radio…

But sometimes technology concerns me. And really, for the same reasons… Making others and myself become lazy fucks. And sometimes miss a view of life that may be important.

One thing I’ll never do is go through the automatic checkout line in a supermarket. I refuse to help put people out of work, even if I don’t save $1.35 on my purchase, or get out a minute faster. And the worst thing is, the staff pushes you to the auto lines! I’m not sure if they are told to do this or they just don’t want to do any work. But it pisses me off. I just think of some jerbone in a suit laughing behind the mirrored wall, knowing he’ll save a nickel when someone gets canned.

Another thing I never understood is the constant video recording of a vacation. I’m not saying that shooting a video is bad, but I’ve seen and have been with people that have the fucking thing on the WHOLE time. What ever happened to using your memory? Taking in what you’re seeing and being a part of it. Enjoying the moment.

I was in Bermuda last year and we were heading down into these old caves, and some jerkoff had his camera rolling the entire time. The light was on, so he was illuminating the walls on the way down. I wanted to ask the guy if he’d enjoy the darkness and claustrophobia from his futon. Meanwhile, taking it away from the rest of us. What a prick.

Everything I’ve filmed of myself with my video camera is personal. (And, I was young and needed the money).

Now, if you’ll excuse me… I’m going to put away my laptop, microwave up a pizza and listen to music on my IPod. And I’m going to record the whole thing on my video camera. Let me know if you want a copy.